When the #MeToo movement took off on social media last year, women from all walks of life across the world, came forward with stories of sexual abuse and assault. Now, a new trending hashtag seeks to answer another question—Why didn't you report earlier.
With the #WhyIDidntReport, sexual assault survivors are taking to Twitter to talk about personal amd social challenges in reporting abuse, and why they keep silent. The hashtag is in response to US President Donald Trump's comments in the wake of Christine Blasey Ford's allegations against Trump's Supreme Court nominee, Brett Kavanaugh.
It all began last week when 51-year-old Ford accused Kavanaugh of sexually assaulting her in the 1980s. As Kavanaugh denied the allegations, Trump tweeted on Thursday: "I have no doubt that, if the attack on Dr Ford was as bad as she says charges would have been immediately filed with local law enforcement by either her or loving parents." This set off the new hashtag which has been going strong with women opening about why it is often difficult to report abuse, and some sharing stories of how they were treated when they actually reported it. For many of the survivors, the abuser was a family member or a close friend, and that in itself forced them to close up.
“He was my father, and I thought I had to protect the family from scandal. He disowned me for my unwillingness to actively lie about it, pretend all was fine. This is my 1st public statement of it and it terrifies me even though he's long dead,” tweeted a user.
“Well i did tell people in school and then got told by my school counselor that i should keep quiet because people were “gossiping” about it and it then would reach the administration and i could get expelled,” wrote another woman.
#WhyIDidntReport is a very important lesson in why victims don’t come forward. I was 7. I didn’t have the language to say what my older half brother was doing, I just knew I didn’t want it. He blamed me and I believed him.
— Jesica Palileo (@jmpalileo) September 23, 2018
#WhyIDidntReport 1st time: I was too young to understand and he threatened to kill me. 2nd time: he had position, privilege, and power and I was ashamed and afraid.
— Sarah Cash (@grainofsand_77) September 23, 2018
#WhyIDidntReport I learned early that nobody would help me. Married 8 yrs and haven’t told my husband. He thinks I’m “jumpy” without knowing why. I’m 38: I’m afraid of the dark, sudden loud noises, obsess about locking doors. I wrote and deleted this tweet at least 10 times.
— Kellie Quick (@kellie_quick) September 23, 2018
The official Women's March account tweeted: "There are too many of these stories. Too many of us have these stories. Too many of us have never felt safe to share them. And men like @realDonaldTrump are why" .
The Twitter movement is also catching up with celebrities who are coming out in support. Actress Alyssa Milano, in an article published on Sunday, shared her story of #WhyIDidntReport. In the article titled I was sexually assaulted as a teen. Here’s why I didn’t report, Milano wrote: “It took me 30 years to tell anyone. And I'm far from alone.” It was, in fact, Milano's tweet that initially set off the #MeToo hashtag, encouraging women to speak up about sexual harassment.
Hey, @realDonaldTrump, Listen the fuck up.
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) September 21, 2018
I was sexually assaulted twice. Once when I was a teenager. I never filed a police report and it took me 30 years to tell me parents.
If any survivor of sexual assault would like to add to this please do so in the replies. #MeToo https://t.co/n0Aymv3vCi
Actress-model Padma Lakshmi, too, took to Twitter to share the story of her sexual assault. “I was 7 the first time I was sexually assaulted. He was a relative of my mom’s second husband. I told my folks and they sent me away,” she tweeted.
She further said that in our 'victim-blaming' culture, it takes immense courage to come forward as the victim is treated like the perpetrator.
I was 7 the first time I was sexually assaulted. He was a relative of my mom’s second husband. I told my folks and they sent me away. #WhyIDidntReport
— Padma Lakshmi (@PadmaLakshmi) September 21, 2018
The third time I was assaulted I was 23. I thought that no one would believe me, because no one wanted to stand up to him. I had seen the way Anita Hill was treated when she came forward. #WhyIDidntReport
— Padma Lakshmi (@PadmaLakshmi) September 21, 2018