Though blessed by Indra to rule for a thousand years, Vikramaditya is said to have lived for two thousand years. Behind that was a clever trick played on the gods by his sorcerer-brother Bhatti.
Indra gifted Vikramaditya with a magical throne, and blessed him to rule from it for a thousand years. Bhatti, who wanted to be his brother’s lifelong companion, prayed to Kaali for a similarly long life. Kaali, to test his devotion, asked him to bring Vikram’s severed head. Vikram heard about the gory demand and happily cut off his own head for the sake of his brother. Bhatti took it to Kaali; she gifted him a lifespan of two thousand years.
Now, Bhatti sneered at the goddess saying, he no longer had any faith in the boons given by the immortals. Indra had blessed his brother to rule for a thousand years, and the guy was lying there headless at a ripe young age. Kaali gave an amused smile and brought Vikram back to life.
As in Murphy's law, so in Vikram-Betaal stories—every solution creates a new problem. The siblings wanted to live together and die together, but now one would rule a thousand years, and the other would live two thousand. The resourceful Bhatti found a way out. He asked Vikram to rule from the throne for six months a year, and spend the remaining six months in the forest (where, to kill boredom, he’d amuse himself carrying corpses and a Betaal!) while Bhatti would rule from the throne as his regent. To cut a long fable short, the duo lived for two thousand years, and died together.
By now, you might be wondering if this column is turning into a fable corner. Two weeks ago we likened Prashant Kishor’s fate with that of a soothsayer in a Tenali Rama tale. Now here I am telling you a Vikram-Betaal tale. What next? The Panchatantra? Aesop’s Fables? Arabian Nights? Or Arthur’s knights?
Can’t help, good readers! Our politics is increasingly turning as bizarre as the fables. Look at what’s happening in Karnataka where Chief Minister Siddaramaiah and his deputy D.K. Shivakumar are playing out a Vikram-Betaal farce.
Two and a half years ago, the two joined hands to defeat the BJP, bringing an otherwise sinking Congress to power in Karnataka. Sidda, the elder of the two and thus the Vikram in our tale, made a claim to the magical throne in Bengaluru, saying he had the support of more people, especially the backward castes which the Congress would need in the days to come.
DK, the schemer, strategist, and the party’s fund-raiser, conceded the claim after much haggling, but suggested a ‘fabulous’ Bhatti scheme for the regime to survive five years—Sidda would rule for half of the regime’s five-year term, and leave the throne to DK for the remaining half.
Somewhere along the line, the script varied from the fable. When the time came for Sidda to go for his vanvaas, he refused. Now Bhatti finds himself outwitted by his elder bro. He looked towards the high command heavens, but found the gods and goddesses split into two camps.
Last heard, the crisis is brewing like south Indian filter coffee in the percolators in both leaders’ homes. They have been inviting each other to power breakfasts in their homes, and sorting out their electoral conundrums over coconut chutney and Mysuru idlis and sambar.
Bon appetit, gentlemen! Stop your squabbles, and count your blessings. You still have a state to rule, unlike your partymen in most of the rest of India. Who knows, the gods may double your blessings in 2028, if you behave well and rule wisely like Vikram and Bhatti.
prasannan@theweek.in