There are precisely five photos of Neil Armstrong on the moon. Five. Today, wannabes go to the loo and click ten pics. As a meme said, “Never before has a generation so diligently recorded themselves accomplishing so little.” Yet, we feel qualified to debate vanities of the US presidential candidates, eh?
Donald Trump has been much reviled for his hairdo. So, is it a toupee, or a weave or a combover? Amy Lasch, 52, a stylist who used to work on The Apprentice reality show, said that it was real, smothered in lacquer and horribly cut.
If you want to be branded sexist, just ask questions about Hillary Clinton’s hair. The natural brunette has been a bottle blonde for years now. Bill Clinton posted a photo with a caption: “She’s still pretty much the same girl I fell in love with in law school.” In that snap, her hair is all curly and brownish. Man is growing blind, I say.
Hillary famously said if she wanted to knock a story off the front pages of dailies, she just had to change her hairstyle. She also said that one significant advantage she had over other presidents was that she wouldn’t gray in office. “I’ve been colouring my hair for years,” she said. Reportedly, once her hairstyling bill for two months came to Rs 1.6 lakh. And, we call Trump vain.
Anarchist collective INDECLINE put up five identical nude statues of Trump in street corners in San Francisco, Los Angeles, Cleveland, Seattle and New York. The statue had a stub of a penis and no balls. Obviously, the installation was called The Emperor had No Balls. Would a similar statue of Hillary with balls have generated as many laughs?
And, it is fair to ask Ivanka Trump what she thinks about the way her father treats women. It becomes unfair only when questioners fail to ask Chelsea Clinton why a certain female friend of her father’s was dubbed the “Energizer” by his security detail.
And, really, are we going to judge a US presidential candidate on, ahem, their bedroom workouts? Let’s not forget Kennedy. And, Nelson Rockefeller, the 41st vice president, died in “undeniably intimate circumstances”. He was 70 and Megan Marshack was 25. Two unforgettable Rockefeller jokes: Nelson thought he was coming, but he was going. Number two is a Q&A: How did Nelson Rockefeller die? Of low BP; 70 over 25.